


The One Where Belarus Has Confusing Feelings About England

by Backtothe60sFuture



Series: Handmade Summoned Confusion [2]
Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Emotional Manipulation, Eventual Romance, F/M, Family Drama, Human Nations | Countries (Hetalia), Imaginary Nations, Love Confessions, Modern Era, Psychological Torture but Belarus is just being dramatic, World Meeting (Hetalia)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-29
Updated: 2020-10-14
Packaged: 2021-03-05 06:27:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 7
Words: 17,876
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25209955
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Backtothe60sFuture/pseuds/Backtothe60sFuture
Summary: Things were going well for Belarus: she was going to eat dinner with Russia again at a later date, there was a chance that he could reciprocate her feelings, and he’d sent her a dress. At least they would be if all of those things were true.Or where Belarus constantly fights with herself over the possibility that she has feelings for England. Her RusBel ship isn’t going down without a fight, and she’s going to drag everyone down with her, even if it’s not helping anyone.
Relationships: Belarus/England (Hetalia), One-sided Lithuania/Belarus
Series: Handmade Summoned Confusion [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1712536
Comments: 16
Kudos: 25





	1. A Package

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Prompts & Short Stories (Special England)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/21587191) by [StarryLittleThing](https://archiveofourown.org/users/StarryLittleThing/pseuds/StarryLittleThing). 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story is based off of the Fifth Prompt: Confused of Prompts & Short Stories(Special England).
> 
> Reading part 1 is needed to understand some references in this story. Not standalone.

_Before the World Meeting in Latvia._

Belarus heard her doorbell ring one afternoon and was surprised to find a package. It had no return address. She had returned from England’s house a few days ago.

Belarus squatted down to grab the cardboard box and brought it inside her house. Belarus grabbed a knife and stabbed the top of the box that was taped. Sliding her knife across and grabbing the flaps, she opened the box.

Inside was package stuffing. Belarus threw out the stuffing and pulled out what looked to be a dress.The dress was very similar to the navy blue dress that Russia gave her and she always wore. This dress was maroon in color and had lace at the bottom and on the collar instead of ruffles. Belarus briefly pondered putting it back into the box and setting it on fire. 

But a voice in the back of her head that sounded oddly like Ukraine said, _It’s nice, you should keep it. Don’t waste clothes._

Belarus sighed and dropped the dress heedlessly into the box. Belarus then felt a smile spread on her face. _Big brother must have sent me a new dress! But why didn’t he put his address?_ Belarus then slapped her palm to her head. _Russia doesn’t want me to know where he lives. Even so he’d leave a P.O. Box._

Belarus shrugged, and went over to the phone. She picked it up off of the receiver and dialed Lithuania. 

“L-lady Belarus! What a surprise! I didn’t expect a call from you! What is the occasion?” 

Belarus thought Lithuania talked too much. “What is Russia’s phone number?” 

“As much as I’d love to give you that Mr. Russia said not to.”

“Please Lithuania, it is important.”

“Oh a-alright, I can’t resist you when you say please.” Lithuania said before giving her Russia’s phone number.

“Lady Belarus would you–.” Belarus cut him off by hanging up the phone.

Belarus could feel herself grinning again. She was going to call Russia and hear his sweet voice over the phone. Belarus dialed Russia’s number.

“H-hello?” Russia asked, voice unsteady.

“Big Brother Russia!” Belarus said, excitement in her voice.

“Belarus! H-how did you get my number?”

“Is not important. I got the beautiful dress you made me. You are too kind brother!” Belarus let out a little laugh as she twirled her finger around the cord. “I’ll ship you a big bottle of vodka as a thank you my beloved.”

“I did not send you a dress. N-now don’t call me anymore.” Russia said, hurriedly before the line _clicked,_ signalling he’d hung up.

Belarus furrowed her eyebrows. _If Russia didn’t send the dress then who did?_

_Lithuania._

Belarus went into her kitchen drawer and pulled out a lighter. Belarus flicked the lighter on and saw the flame burn. She went back over to the cardboard box.

She stared at the box in disgust, repulsion, and loathing. She clenched her fist and grit her teeth, lowering the flame close to the edge of the box.

_Wait. What if it wasn’t him? Maybe someone else?_

Upon thinking a bit more, she ruled Lithuania out because he would’ve put his address and he didn’t sew. So she wouldn’t burn the dress, but she had to find out who sent it to her. The best solution she had was to wear it at the World Meeting and hope the dressmaker would notice.

It would take too much time to simply ask every single person. 

_I kind of want to flaunt the dress for Russia, and make him jealous._

She only wore what Russia made, or she bought herself. The last thing she wanted to do was make Russia think she was not available for him. But the dress might make him pay more attention to her, like England said, she shouldn’t try so hard. Russia should come to her, not the other way around.

Belarus unlit the lighter and grabbed the dress out of the box. Belarus went to her room and hung the dress on a hanger to go beside her black one.

Then she went back to get the cardboard box it came in. She then sat inside it for a few hours before watching the sun go down.

~~~~~~~

Belarus went into the guest room. She’d have to wash the bed sheets now that England had slept on them. Belarus pulled the sheets off of the bed before she gathered them up. She walked to the laundry room and stuffed them into the washing machine. Belarus went back to get the pillow cases. Belarus grabbed a pillow. 

_How long had it been since I had someone else over before England came?_ Belarus frowned.

_Only Russia mattered._

Russia hadn’t been over in a few decades not counting the recent incident last week. 

But something inside of Belarus caused her to bring the pillow a bit closer to her face.

Maybe it was the allure of Male scent or something.

Whatever it was, Belarus soon found herself nose deep into the pillow smelling whatever shampoo the Englishman used. It smelt earthly with a hint of rose petals.

_“I don’t think you should’ve done that.”_ Belarus flinched and dropped the pillow. “Fuck!”

She turned to see Russia, the version in her mind anyway. He narrowed his eyes dangerously as if giving her a warning.

_That is right. I’m getting rid of England’s scent for when Russia will sleep over._ She thought. Belarus pulled off the pillow case and went back into the laundry room to throw it in with the rest of the sheets. She poured in some detergent and turned on the washer.

_“You’re loyal only to me aren’t you Belarus?”_ Imaginary Russia asked, his hand resting on her cheek. His eyes held a worry that Belarus was not used to seeing. She was leaning with her back against the washing machine.

“Of course Russia. Are you doubting my devotion to you?” Belarus asked as the imaginary Russian looked away from her. “Russia?” She asked as the imaginary Russian clenched his jaw. He had his sights on something. 

“ _What are you doing here?”_ He asked someone down the hall.

Belarus was shocked. Her only imaginary companion for years was Russia, seeing as the real Russia hadn’t come to his senses yet. But another imaginary person decided to invade her mindscape? It only spelt trouble.

“ _Aww Russia you aren’t threatened by me, are you?”_ Imaginary England mocked him, pinching Imaginary Russia’s cheek.

“Go away mother fucker!” Belarus yelled at the other imaginary nation. “Leave Russia and I the fuck alone!” She continued, clenching her fists.

“ _Darling, I’m a part of your imagination. You want me here.”_ The imaginary nation said, poking her in the forehead, a sly smile on his face.

Belarus shook her head. “Russia, make him go away!” 

Imaginary Russia took out his pipe. _“I suggest you leave or I will crack your skull open. You’re upsetting my beloved Belarus!”_ Imaginary Russia’s stare was intense and dangerous.

Imaginary England’s eyes widened, he backed up. _“A-Alright I’ll go...for now. Till we meet again Belarus,”_ He said with a wink before he disappeared.

“He won’t be back, Russia don’t worry! I only love you, forever and always,” Belarus said before pulling the imaginary nation in for a passionate kiss on the lips. 

Imaginary Russia chuckled and patted Belarus’s hair. _“I know. If only my real counterpart could see how wonderful you are.”_

“He will one day.” Belarus said before he too was gone. Deep down Belarus wasn’t so sure if those words were true.

As the washer washed away England’s scent from the bed sheets he slept on, Belarus hoped they’d wash away the memory of his scent from her mind too.

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome back folks for part 2! Hope you enjoyed the first chapter!
> 
> I got the idea for the physical maifestations of her love intrests from the movie version of "To All The Boys I Loved Before", I thought it was cute.
> 
> This entire story/part will be told from Belarus’s Third Person Limited P.O.V.
> 
> Thank you for reading! Criticism welcome.


	2. The Meeting

Belarus stood in front of the meeting room doors. She flattened out her dress for creases before she tilted her nose up in poise. She straightened her bow and walked into the World Meeting room. She was wearing a maroon dress, the one a mysterious seamstress/seamster sent her.

Nations were lightly chatting amongst each other. The meeting was going to start in about ten minutes. Belarus saw Russia. She felt a spasm in her legs to run up to him. But Belarus was going to use England’s advice so she restrained herself.

She walked up to Ukraine instead. “Ukraine.” 

“Belarus! Sweet sister, you look...different?” Ukraine tapped her chin. “I don’t know what it is. Anyway I am glad to be talking to you! You usually ignore me to talk to Russia!”

“I’m wearing a different dress.” Belarus said unenthused.

“Russia told me about the little tea party you two had. I’m so happy you’re getting along! Maybe one day the three of us can have tea together!”

“Maybe.” Belarus muttered. 

Ukraine was sweet and wanted them to have a good relationship, but Belarus knew that Ukraine gave Russia the scarf he treasured. She was her competition so until they got married Belarus couldn’t really trust her.

“I hope you’re doing well. I haven’t visited you in a while but you know the farm gets to be tough work and I forget how much time has passed.”

“Yes, I’m fine.”

“That’s great because I worry about you little sister.” Ukraine pulled her into a hug. Belarus rolled her eyes and waited until she let go. 

Belarus felt that eyes were on her and turned her head to see England looking at her. England looked away from her really quickly, resuming whatever conversation he was having with Japan. The nation had a habit of staring at her, almost like Lithuania did.

Belarus shrugged it off and went over to Russia. Russia was pushing Latvia’s head down when he saw her approaching. Latvia was shaking and Russia’s smile turned into a frown.

His eyes were wide in fear.

“B-Belarus!”

Belarus pinches the skirt of her dress, pulling it up a bit and doing a little spin.

“You like what you see Big Brother?”

“N-no! Go away!” Russia said hurriedly.

“You’re right Big Brother the most beautiful dresses are the ones you’ve made me. I’m only wearing it today because I want to find out who gave it to me. I’ll never wear it again if it makes you unhappy.”

Belarus said sitting down in her seat next to him. 

Russia sat down in his seat and looked at Germany who was at the head of the meeting table. “Alright everyone we will start the World Meeting. Latvia–.”

The door opened following a loud slam and everyone snapped their heads in the direction of the door. 

“The Hero has arrived! Your day has gotten a million times better, you’re welcome.” America said before strolling to his seat. “You may continue, Germany.” America said, sitting down.

“Glad you are joining us today America.” Germany said, to the annoying nation before turning to everyone else.

“Latvia please come up to the podium, it is your turn to host.” Latvia was sitting between Ukraine and Lithuania. Latvia got up and made his way to the podium.

“I want everyone to pay attention! No distractions!” Germany yelled before Latvia cleared his throat.

Belarus immediately tuned him out. She only listened when Russia was at the podium. Belarus briefly wondered why she came to these boring meetings. They never talked about anything interesting. But then she remembered that Russia was here and this was the only time she would see him. 

Russia was paying attention to Latvia. Belarus admired Russia’s platinum blond hair, perfectly placed upon his head. She wished she could run her fingers through the fine strands. She also wanted to touch his soft pale skin that easily burned in the sun. Belarus frowned, remembering that Lithuania got to spread sunscreen on Russia’s back when the nation’s had their vacation/ World Meeting in Cuba last year. Belarus volunteered but Russia ran from her and asked Lithuania instead. Russia even refused to do her back. She had to begrudgingly ask Ukraine to spread sunscreen on her instead.

_Maybe this summer Russia will let me and vice versa when we go to Italy for the World Meeting ._

Belarus sighed, it wasn’t fair that she was in love with someone so perfect. She loved everything about her brother, his soft childlike face, his sweet laugh, his innocence, and even his violent nature. She loved that Russia wasn’t a pushover and got anyone to do whatever he wanted just by being himself. They were both alike in so many ways and she didn’t understand how he didn’t see that they were soul mates.

Belarus felt eyes on her again, burning her with an intensity that was foreign to her. Belarus furrowed her eyebrows and snapped her head in the direction she assumed it was coming from. She found herself looking at England again. England turned back towards Latvia.

_Could he have made the dress?_

It was a possibility. Belarus was going to ask him during the snack break. 

Belarus then heard her phone _ping_. Belarus pulled out her phone and saw some pictures from France. They were of her and England. 

_What if Big Brother saw these?_ She knew that they were taken out of context. She frowned, almost cracking her phone in the process. Her new objective was to confront France about the pictures. The last thing she needed was Russia thinking she liked England in a romantic sense. 

Germany dismissed them for a break. She was going to confront France but he was talking to England and then Lithuania was over there too.

  
  


“Belarus, is that a different dress?” Poland asked her. Belarus thought Poland was annoying but he took up Lithuania’s time so he wasn’t all bad.

“Yes Poland, I got it in the mail. Did you make it for me?” 

“No way, girl I don’t have the patience to make clothes. It’s cute. I always thought you could use a bit more color in your life.”

“I’m only wearing it for today. Big brother does not like it so I will get rid of it.”

“I don’t think I could live my life the way you do. I care about myself too much,” Poland said with a wave of his hand. “But I’m sure you could ask Italy or France, they like that kind of stuff,” he continued.

“Ask me what?” Italy asked, appearing beside them with a slice of pizza in his hand. He turned to Belarus, “Oh Belarus I didn’t know you had more clothes! That dress is so pretty on you!” If it were possible Italy’s voice raised another octave with how excited he was. “If you didn’t carry those scary knives or look like you could kill me, I’d ask you out, bella!” 

“You didn’t make this dress, did you?”

Italy shook his head, “Nope.” 

He bit into his slice of pizza, “But whoever did, sure did a good job!”

Belarus noticed that Lithuania and England had left the room together.

_Good, now I can go talk to France._

The nation was already in the snack room grabbing some cheese. “France.” Belarus hissed at the other nation. France looked up from his cheese and raised his eyebrows.

He smiled, “Belarus, as beautiful and radiant as ever. You’re wearing a different dress! That is fantastic, I thought those old rags Russia made you–.” 

Belarus by then had walked up to France and pulled his collar. She held a knife up to his throat.

“I thought we had a deal. I didn’t tell England you were at his house and you don’t tell Russia I was at England’s cleaning.” 

“I-I didn’t!”

“Don’t lie to me! What about these pictures? Don’t you think he’ll know once he sees them!?”

France let out a nervous chuckle. “I didn’t send them to Russia. If he sees them, just explain the misunderstanding. Russia knows you are in love with him , non?” 

“Do you know my brother at all?!” Belarus grabbed a fist full of his hair.

“Oww! My beautiful and sexy hair is not to be treated this way!” France whined.

“If Russia so much as thinks I’m not in love with him I will slice your head clean off of your neck!” She stared at him with a furious intensity.

“He won’t! Je promets! C'est une blague! He’ll think it’s funny because there’s no way you’d like the Black Sheep!” France said with a smile, before his features morphed into one of surprise. “Unless…”

Belarus yanked France’s hair back causing him to hit his head against the wall with a loud _thump!_ France winced in pain. 

“He better think it’s a fucking joke you bastard.” Belarus said letting his hair go and lowering her knife. She swiftly turned and walked away from him. 

She almost bumped into someone coming into the snack room. “B-Belarus!” England said, shocked to see her. “Out of my way Tea Drinker.” Belarus narrowed her eyes. He was the last person she wanted to see at this particular moment. 

England stepped back, “You don’t have to be so rude.” He said crossing his arms. Belarus pushed past him and went back into the meeting room.

_How dare France question her loyalty and devotion to Russia!_

Belarus tuned everyone out again when the meeting resumed. She had no interest in changing seats, she was next to her beloved Russia and there was no need to change that. 

Soon the meeting was over.

Belarus saw Lithuania and England talking outside the meeting building, she was going to ask the other nation about the dress when she remembered that she was supposed to tell everyone about his terrible cooking. In her own way she’d be getting back at the Englishman for deviating her feelings just minimally from Russia.

Belarus told Lithuania the story before going over to the 5 Scandinavian countries that called themselves the Nordics. 

“Belarus!” The tall annoying one known as Denmark said. “What a surprise!” He continued. “You snagged Russia yet or is he still playing hard to get?” The tall annoying one nudged her, a bright smile on his face. The blond hat wearing one known as Norway stomped on his foot. “Ouch Nor! You didn’t have to do that! Why are you so mean?”

“Belarus! It’s nice you came to talk to us. What did you want to say? Denmark is a bit overbearing, would you excuse him please?” Santa Claus or Finland said, giving her his attention. The tall glasses wearing one known as Sweden nodded in agreement.

Belarus relayed the story of England burning their dinner and then eating Chinese food, once again. Unlike Lithuania, the Nordics found the story amusing, and she even got a small smile out of the tall glasses wearing one. They all commented on how pretty she looked in her new dress but to her disappointment none of them made it.

Belarus was going back to wait with Russia when she bumped into America. “Yo, Belarus nice dress! I thought you only owned like one, I’m glad you’re not a hobo.” He grinned. 

“I know you didn’t make this dress, hamburger eater.”

“Damn right I didn’t, do I look like a girl? Are you trying to find out who made it?” Belarus nodded. “Did you ask–.”

“Lady Belarus! Your dress, it's different.” Lithuania interrupted, approaching them. Belarus furrowed her eyebrows and ignored him. 

“Hamburger eater, you want to hear a funny story?” She asked the other nation.

“Yeah shoot! I love a good funny story!” He said.

Belarus relayed the story of England burning their dinner and then eating Chinese food, once again. America laughed loud and boisterous. 

“Holy shit. You didn’t eat any did you?” Belarus shook her head as America wiped a tear from his eye. “Good.”

"Now that you both are through talking, Belarus, did Russia make you a new dress? Where’s your old one?” Lithuania spouted frantically. 

“Whoa Liet my dude, calm down.” America said, placing a hand on his shoulder. 

“Hamburger eater did you have a suggestion on who the dressmaker could be?”

“Hmm? Oh yeah!” He snapped his fingers. “It’s probably–.”

“Me! I did it!” Lithuania said, suddenly. 

“No, I don’t think so,” Belarus shook her head.

“Yeah...let me look at the ruffles on the collar…” America said squinting his eyes and leaning in close to her to get a closer look. “England. It’s definitely him.”

“How are you so sure?” Lithuania asked him, his expression anxious. 

“Dude, England used to make majority of my fucking clothes when I was younger. If anyone would know, it would be me.” He said, slightly annoyed.

“Belarus, what about Mr. Russia?” Lithuania asked her.

Belarus gripped her knife. She felt her hands trembling in rage. 

“Pfft. What about that Commie bastard? Did you see the pictures France took?”

Belarus wanted to stab someone, scream, shout, anything. She was frustrated with all of the questioning and doubt she got. She loved Russia and only Russia! Didn’t she explain that plainly enough?

And before anyone could say anything else, Belarus slashed her knife across America’s throat. America coughed blood in her face as it filled his mouth. He stared at her, blue eyes wide, as he brought his hands to his throat. He slumped to his knees as more blood covered his fingers. Belarus stared, not really reacting. “Mr. America!” Lithuania gasped leaning down to catch the now passed out nation. 

_That’ll show everyone not to question my love for Russia._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Translations:  
> Je promets!--I promise!  
> C'est une blague!--It’s a joke! 
> 
> Thank you for reading! Criticism Welcome.


	3. Dreams of A Dressmaker

Belarus was back to wearing her blue dress the next two meetings in Latvia. 

Belarus was now in her hotel room, sitting on the edge of her bed. Half of the nations who came to the meetings usually stayed in the same hotel together. The dress was now in her hands, she planned on burning it later. 

She had the cardboard box on her head. She had one question. _Why?_ Why would England make her a dress? It was not her birthday and she’d already gotten the handkerchief from him. What greater purpose did it serve?

_“Stop thinking about it. It is a stupid dress, my counterpart hated it so you should destroy it.”_ Imaginary Russia said appearing beside her on the bed.

_He’s right._

“ _But it’s such a nice dress. Everyone complimented how great you looked in it.”_ Imaginary England said leaning against the door of her bedroom.

Belarus narrowed her eyes at him. “The only opinion that matters is Big Brother’s.”

 _“Are you saying that if he liked the dress you would’ve kept it even though my real counterpart made it?”_ He said pushing off from against the door and approaching her.

“Yes, if it makes Big Brother happy.”

_“What about you?”_

“If Russia is happy then I am happy, unless he wants to be with someone else, that I will not allow.” Belarus crossed her arms.

 _“I think you want to keep the dress.”_ He said standing in front of her.

“N-no! I don’t.” She leaned.

 _“You sound uncertain._ ” He said, his smile malicious and vile. 

_Why has my mind created such a monster?_

Belarus shook her head. She wanted to hold Imaginary Russia’s hand but he had pulled away from her. She looked at him for a source of comfort but the imaginary nation looked at her with utter repulsion and disdain. His eyes were cold and had lost their warmth. 

_“You said he wouldn’t be back Belarus.”_ He said to her. 

Belarus was scared, she didn’t want to lose him too. He was part of her imagination for God’s sake. Belarus let out a scream, she wanted Imaginary England to go away. 

_Nothing is changing, everything is the same! So why is he here?_

Belarus pulled the box off of her head and threw it at him, but of course it just went through him and hit the wall behind him.

“I hate you!” She screamed at the imaginary nation in front of her. He leaned down and delicately placed a hand on her cheek.

_“We’re not enemies Belarus.”_

“If I get rid of this dress, I’ll get rid of you!” Belarus was about to get up to find a lighter when she heard a light knock on her door.

She stomped over to the door and opened it, without checking who it was. “I’m busy, go away!” She said, going to shut the door again.

“God woman, I was just checking to see how you were doing!” England said, putting out a hand to stop her from closing it. “I just have a quick question.”

“Fine.”

“Is everything going well with you and Russia since you backed off a bit?” England asked her a bit peeved.

“No, everything is worse because of France and you!” Belarus crossed her arms.

“That bastard frog! Did Russia see the pictures?” England had taken a step forward and was now in the doorframe. Belarus took a step back into her hotel room.

“No he did not see them, but it didn’t stop America from thinking they were true.”

“So that’s why you sliced his throat.” England muttered with a look of disapproval on his face. “You need to work on your people skills,” he continued. 

“I don’t care about talking to anyone else except for Russia.”

“But Russia cares about other people, you’ll have to be nice to the people he interacts with. At least know how to fake it.” He said with a wave of his hand.

“Stabbing people who annoy me solves so many problems, tea drinker. Wasn’t the meeting a bit better for you?” Belarus gave him a coy smile.

England gave her a smirk, “I have to agree the meeting was quieter without America around, so I’ll let you have this one. Anyway, I’ll explain everything to Russia if he finds out about the photos.”

“He won’t understand.”

“He will Belarus, because you and I both know you would never have feelings for me. Don’t worry about it, alright?” Belarus saw a kindness in his eyes. It sickened her, causing her stomach to twist in knots.“Since you seem to be doing fine, I’ll go.” England said, stepping back from the doorframe.

Belarus poked her head out of the door, looking right and left. She didn’t see any other nations in the hallway. Belarus pulled England inside of her room before shutting the door.

“What are you doing!?” England exclaimed in a bit of a panic. “Do you know what this looks like?” His eyebrows were furrowed and he waved his arms around animatedly.

Belarus leaned her back against the door. She let out a breath. “You made the dress I was sent.” She looked at him and for a few seconds her midnight blues met his emerald greens. England blinked before his cheeks were colored pastel pink with blush.

“Why would I do something like that?” He scoffed, not meeting her eyes. 

“I do not know, why would you?” Belarus stepped closer to him.

“I-I wouldn’t! It’s a pointless endeavor! You wouldn’t wear anything I made. So I wouldn’t bother.” 

Belarus searched his eyes, and the most dominant emotion she could see was anxiousness.

“America said you made the dress.”

“What does he know?” He said with the wave of his hand. 

Belarus gripped the Englishman’s collar bringing them mere centimeters apart. They were nose to nose. Belarus grit her teeth. “Don’t lie to me!” She snapped at him.

“Alright! Alright I made the dress!” Belarus let go of his collar, pushing him away from her.

“Why?”

“I don’t know. I thought maybe you could use another dress?” He said, raising an eyebrow.

Belarus grabbed the dress and threw it back at him. 

“Take it! I don’t want it anymore! Russia didn’t like it anyway!”

“Fine! But I think it’s ridiculous that your fashion choices are made solely on Russia’s opinions! Just because you keep the dress doesn’t mean you love him any less, and one bad outfit wouldn’t matter if he actually loved you!” He said.

As soon as it left his mouth Belarus slapped him across the face. England stood shocked, gingerly touching the part of his cheek where she hit him.

“How dare you say that! Get out!” She was shaking with rage again. She clenched her jaw and it took everything in her not to stab him. 

England frowned.

“I can’t take this dress. You can get rid of it however you wish but I’m not keeping it.” England handed it to her and she snatched it out of his hands. With that he stalked out the door and shut it after himself with a loud _slam!_

\----------------------------------

When Belarus was back at home, she was plagued with nightmares. It was the same nightmare over and over. It always started out with her and Russia sitting together and having tea. Russia was laughing and so was she. Russia would then pull out a little box. Belarus would feel her heart race and her palms become sweaty. She had been waiting for this moment her entire life. Russia would rise from his seat, a smile on his sweet soft face. Then he would get down on one knee by her chair. 

“Belarus we’ve known each other long enough. Will you marry me?” He opened the box that held a diamond ring inside.

Belarus would feel her throat clog up. Tears filled her eyes. She smiled at him and opened her mouth but a small pile of rose petals fell out. Russia would look at the petals and frown before getting back up.

“I see.” He would say.

Belarus would try to tell him yes but more rose petals fell out of her mouth. _Russia wait!_

Russia would take his ring with him and begin to leave as Belarus struggled to catch up to him and tell him that she wanted to marry him. More rose petals fell and she couldn’t catch up to Russia. She would slump to her knees on the ground and cry. Then she’d see a trail of flax petals. 

Before she could see where the trail led she would wake up in a cold sweat. 

Belarus decided to finally call someone about the nightmares after two weeks of terrible sleep. 

Belarus was getting ready for bed. She looked at herself in the mirror. She had dark circles under her eyes and her head pounded. She called Russia first.

“Big Brother, I’m having trouble sleeping. Could you come over and help me?”

“N-No! I’m not g-good at that, call Ukraine.” 

The line _clicked_ dead as he hung up. Belarus blinked and dialed Ukraine.

“Belarus? Are you alright?” Ukraine sounded like she was woken up out of her sleep. She let out a yawn.

“Ukraine, could you fucking come over? I’m having trouble sleeping.” 

“Of course sweet sister! I’ll get in my car right away! Hold on, alright?”

“Thank you Ukraine.” Belarus hung up the phone.

Belarus got herself a glass of milk and got a crime novel to read. Ukraine would be there in about 6 hours in her car. Belarus got halfway through the novel when Ukraine rang her doorbell.

Belarus saw that it was now 2 a.m. 

Belarus opened the door and let her sister in. “Belarus, I came as fast as I could!” She had a bag slung over her shoulder.

“Yes I see sister.”

“You are having trouble sleeping? Have you tried warm milk?”

“I’m not having trouble getting to sleep. I’m having nightmares, dumbass.”

“Oh! Well, let us get comfy and while we snuggle together you can tell me about the nightmares.”

Belarus frowned, “Alright.” Belarus went into her bedroom and sat in her nightgown on her bed. She waited for Ukraine to finish changing in the bathroom. Ukraine was the closest thing Belarus and Russia had to a mother. Even though she didn’t like that Ukraine stood in the way of her and Russia sometimes, she didn’t mind letting the other woman nurture her.

Ukraine entered the room and Belarus laid down in her bed. Ukraine slid in beside her and pulled her head to rest on her chest. Ukraine ran her fingers through Belarus’s hair. Belarus felt calmer, feeling Ukraine’s warmth.

“Now, tell big sister your nightmares.” Belarus wrapped her arm across Ukraine’s waist.

“It always starts the same. Big brother and I are sitting across from each other, having tea...” Then Belarus continued relaying the rest of her dream.

“Hmm. It sounds like maybe you are hesitant to marry Russia because you want to focus on gardening!”

Belarus didn’t have a flower garden, she had a little farm for potatoes and greens. .

“Ukraine I don’t think that’s what it is.”

“You want to have a garden full of roses, but you being in love with Russia is stopping that! Sweet sister we should plant roses in your backyard! It would be so pretty!” 

Belarus sighed and rolled her eyes.

“Sure Ukraine, we’ll plant some fucking flowers.”

“Yay! Now you should be able to sleep!” 

Belarus felt a small pressure on the top of her hair, and could assume Ukraine kissed her on the top of the head. Belarus snuggled into her sister’s large bosom.“Good night sweet sister.”

“Good night Ukraine.”

Belarus let herself drift into the dark abyss of sleep.

Belarus had the same dream again but this time she followed the trail of flax pedals. She followed them out of her house and soon found herself in front of another house. A much larger house.Belarus knocked on the door, and England opened it. Belarus opened her mouth and more rose petals fell out. England’s eyes widened before he opened his mouth too.

And out fell flax petals.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Criticism welcome.


	4. A Visit to Russia's

Ukraine and Belarus went out to buy roses to plant the next day. They planted the roses in her backyard and Belarus dug up some potatoes to eat for later.

They now stood at Belarus’s doorstep. “This was fun!” Ukraine said, pulling Belarus into a hug. 

“Yes.” Belarus muttered.

“Well I’m going home. I’m glad I could help you little sister. If you need me, just call. I will come as fast as I can.”

Belarus nodded and Ukraine turned to leave. She walked towards her car before getting in. Soon Ukraine was back on the road to her house.

Belarus went back into her house and took out the dress. It was worse than she thought, she had to destroy it before it was too late. Belarus decided the best thing to do was to throw the dress into her fireplace. She squatted down in front of the fireplace before throwing it in. She watched as the flames swallowed the fabric, turning it black.It had not burned it to ashes yet but it would be gone soon.

Belarus stood back up. _“You did the right thing, Belarus.”_ Imaginary Russia said appearing beside her and resting a hand on her shoulder.

_“Oh woe is me. You’ve destroyed the source of my power. Now I must go away forever. Blagh.”_

Belarus turned to see Imaginary England draped across her couch. He had a hand on his forehead and his mouth was open. He had his eyes closed. 

_"Yes! Die you bastard!”_ Imaginary Russia encouraged.

In response the other Imaginary nation laughed, a low rumbling sound.

 _“You really thought it would be that easy?”_ He asked, in what could be described as a condescending way.

Belarus pursed her lips. She did think it would be that easy.

_“You know it would be easier just to accept what’s happening, instead of fighting me.”_ He said getting up.

“No! Never!” She yelled back. 

Belarus went to hold onto Imaginary Russia but he stepped away from her.

_“You don’t even have his support anymore.”_ He was right in front of her now, a devilish grin on his face.

_“If you’re going to be stubborn, then I can be stubborn too.”_

And before she could move, the imaginary nation pressed his lips upon hers. Belarus was flooded with the memory of England after Russia came over for tea. She felt a warmth blossom in her chest. She remembered the smell of roses and the excitement coursing through her veins because for a few moments she had been genuinely happy.

Belarus blinked. “Why did you do that?” 

_“I didn’t do anything. This is all you, darling.”_ He said tapping her on the nose, his smile was less sinister and more endearing.

Belarus turned back toward the fireplace. Imaginary Russia was not there. Belarus looked around frantically. “Russia? Russia! Where are you?”

_“He’s gone.”_ Imaginary England said.

~~~~~~~~~~

Belarus got a call from Russia saying that he’d visited China recently. Russia was inviting her over to share some of China’s food with him at his house. She agreed instantly and hung up the phone.

Belarus packed her luggage with her corsets, underwear, stockings and black dress. She packed her toiletries and the kitchen knives England had bought for her. 

_How ironic would it be if I stabbed him with one?_

Belarus booked a train ride to Russia from Minsk. She didn’t have enough for a plane ticket. Belarus listened to rock music in order to try to block out her thoughts. The last thing she wanted was to think about her muddled feelings about England and her dreams. She stared out the window and watched the scenery go by.

Approximately 9 hours later Belarus was in Moscow. Belarus got her luggage from the storage on the train and went through the station to get a taxi. Belarus hailed a taxi and a few minutes later she was in front of Russia’s house. She hadn’t been to Russia since the Soviet Union disbanded. This was a different house, at some point between now and then Russia changed his address. 

Russia’s house had a forest of trees next to it. Belarus walked up the walkway, bringing her luggage with her. She felt her load get considerably lighter on her left side. She turned to see Lithuania. The nation gave her a small smile. “I-I thought you needed a bit of help.” Belarus frowned.

“What are you doing here?”

Lithuania let out a light chuckle.

“Mr. Russia invited me. I was told we’d be having China’s food.” Lithuania said.

Belarus let out a low grumble. 

_Lithuania and England will be here._

Belarus noticed that Russia had a sort of favoritism for Lithuania. Besides having him do Russia’s bidding, Russia also spent the most time with Lithuania outside of the World Meetings. There was also a fondness in Russia’s eyes when he talked about or was in Lithuania’s presence. Belarus held resentment for Lithuania because of it.

“Lithuania?” They heard from farther back. Belarus turned to see England just stepping out of his taxi. His large eyebrows were furrowed. Belarus looked over at Lithuania, his eyes were wide, presumably in shock. 

“England? I suppose you’re here via Russia’s invitation as well.” Lithuania smiled at him, and Belarus could tell there was something off about it.

England joined them in the middle of the walkway with his luggage. “Yes, I wasn’t aware you’d be here. Well that’s nice.” England gave Lithuania a smile, more genuine than the one Lithuania was giving him it seemed.

England turned to her then and he frowned. She was a bit startled to feel a bit upset at the expression he gave her. She wanted a smile too. Belarus frowned back at him.

“Belarus. I’ll be willing to put aside our disagreement because I want everything to go smoothly between you and Russia this weekend. So I’ll be polite.” He said before giving her a slight nod in acknowledgment and walking past them up the rest of the walkway.

“Fine!” Belarus said after him. _The nerve of him. He’s upset with me when he was the one who said those mean and hurtful things? How dare he!_

“What was that about?” Lithuania asked.

“Nothing Lithuania.” Belarus muttered following the Englishman.

Russia opened the door. “Welcome comrades! I am so happy to have you all here for the weekend! It takes me back to the Soviet Union days when my home was full of people!” Russia said, stepping aside to let them in. He was grinning so wide it made his eyes squint.

England stood as Russia enveloped him in a hug. “If you like, you could become one with Mother Russia and stay forever!” 

England let out a nervous chuckle, “I’ve had enough of alliances and acquiring countries, as an Empire. So I’ll have to pass on that offer.”

“That is too bad.” He said before pulling Lithuania into a hug. “How about you, Liet? You miss being a part of the Soviet Union, da?”

When Russia let him go, Lithuania gave his weird smile again. “O-Oh no Mr. Russia, I’m ok as I am now in my own home.”

“Ok, that is fine for now.” Russia shrugged.

Russia turned to Belarus, eyes wide.

“Can I become one with you Big Brother?” 

“N-no.” Belarus frowned, she did not ask further. She was taking England’s advice by not trying so hard. Belarus stood and waited for her brother to open his arms to pull her into a hug. He did not.

“I-I’m glad you came, little sister.” He said with a nod.

“Of course. I love to spend time with you Big Brother.” Belarus nodded in return.

Russia showed them to their rooms, they would have dinner in a few hours.

Lithuania set one of her bags down in her room. “I see you are back to wearing your blue dress Belarus. It looks really pretty on you,” Lithuania said, still in her room.

“I burned the other one that England made,” Belarus said, ignoring the compliment.

“G-Good!” He blurted out, before letting out a sigh. “You don’t need anything from anyone else anyway! Russia’s the most important, right?”

“Right.” She agreed.

Lithuania nodded. “I’m glad you haven’t changed despite all of that silliness that France started.”

Belarus nodded, unease stirring in her stomach. “Well I’ll leave you alone. I’m like crowding your space.” He said with a laugh.

If she was left alone _he_ would come back.

“No! Stay!” Belarus hurriedly gripped Lithuania’s arm.

Belarus decided she hated Imaginary England more than she did Lithuania. And if he was up here with her, he wouldn’t be downstairs with Russia. So, it was a win, win situation.

“Oh! Of course, Lady Belarus!” Belarus led Lithuania out onto the balcony outside of her room.

Belarus and Lithuania leaned over the railing looking out at the forest next to Russia’s home. They stood in silence for a few moments. Belarus noticed Lithuania’s cheeks were rosier than usual. 

“You were at England’s house weren’t you? What did Russia put you up to?” Belarus asked, expression pointed.

“I-I was.” Lithuania looked away from her, “Mr. Russia wanted me to make sure you didn’t have England summon him again.” 

Belarus frowned. “I won’t do that anymore.”

“You won't have to! Mr. Russia will visit you voluntarily now, I’m sure of it!” He smiled at her, bright, and joyful.

“Give me my knife.” She said as she was reminded of it.

“A-ah I don’t have it here. I’ll get it when I get home. I-I could bring it to your house.”

“Ok Lithuania. You better give it back or else.” She said, now nose to nose with him. She narrowed her eyes. 

“I-I will, trust me Lady Belarus.” Lithuania nodded. Belarus stepped back and leaned back over the railing.

“Lithuania, can I ask you for some advice?” She said looking at her fidgeting hands over the railing. Belarus was running out of options and time. She needed answers and had very little resources at her disposal.

“Yes! I’m always willing to help you. What do you need advice on?”

“I’ve been having nightmares and intrusive thoughts about a person I know. I got rid of all the stuff that reminds me of them but it did not help. Am I sick? Is this some kind of curse?”

“Nightmares? Are you scared of this person? I will be willing to take care of them for you!” Lithuania said, tone serious; he was studying her eyes.

“No. I just want to know why this is happening.”

“I don’t really understand Belarus. Is this person torturing you?”

“Yes! I’m being tortured in my mind! How do I make it stop?” Belarus walked over and gripped Lithuania’s shoulders. Lithuania furrowed his eyebrows.

“Belarus, what is happening?” He looked more panicked than she felt.

“Lithuania, have you not been listening? I’m being tortured in my mind with nightmares and thoughts of a person I know.”

Lithuania was quiet for a few moments, presumably in thought. “Maybe um, well... nightmares are said to be the subconscious mind’s way of communicating our waking feelings. How do you feel about this person in real life that would cause nightmares?”

Belarus blinked. Belarus didn’t think about how she felt about England because she didn’t want to feel anything about him. The only person she wanted to have any type of feelings for was Russia. 

“I-I don’t know.” Belarus said quietly and looked down at her feet.

“Belarus, I think you’ll figure it out. I-if you need a shoulder to lean on, I’ll be happy to be there for you.” 

“That is nice of you Lithuania. Maybe I misjudged you, you’re not just Russia’s bitch.”

“W-What? I-I’ve never–! I would never do anything to get between you and Mr. Russia!” Lithuania said waving his arms in dismissal.

“I kid Lithuania.” Belarus said to the panicking nation.

_Mostly._

~~~~~~~~

Russia made them a large dinner, with potato salad, pot roast stewed in tomato sauce, and pasta as a side. Belarus was surprised because she thought they were having China’s food. They were all drinking vodka.

Belarus was next to England and Lithuania was across from him. Russia was at the head of the table, next to England and Lithuania. “Belarus, Russia asked me to handcuff your ankle to this chair.” England said kneeling down to do so. Belarus sighed, she thought she was doing pretty well at restraining herself from Russia.

“Fine.”

“I hope you all enjoy the food!” Russia said, having filled their plates with portions of the meat, potato salad and pasta.

“Feel free to get more if you’d like, da.” He added. 

Russia prayed over the food and they soon started eating. It was delicious. Belarus hoped that Russia would cook for the two of them when they got married. For the most part only the sounds of silverware _clinking_ and scraping against their glass plates were heard. 

“Big Brother this food is amazing!” Belarus said after a few moments when they’d all finished their plates.

Russia gave her a small smile, “Blagodaryu vas.”

“Y-Yes Mr. Russia the food is good.” Russia looked at Lithuania, his cheeks dusted pink.

“Da I worked hard on it. I made the potato salad from scratch.” He nodded.

“O-oh really? I couldn’t even tell with how well you made it.” Lithuania gave Russia one of his forced smiles. 

“England, what do you say?”

“I don’t usually like any other meals besides my own but Russia you surprised me. This roast is fantastic, how did you make it?” Belarus noticed that his cheeks were pink. Belarus also noticed his glass was empty. Belarus had only finished half of her drink. Lithuania and Russia had emptied their glasses too.

“It’s not much to it really.” He said before going into detail about how he seasoned the meat and drenched it in wine.

“Oh I’ll have to try that when I make dinner at home.” England said. Belarus let out a small snicker and Russia did too. England furrowed his eyebrows and frowned. “Oh whatever. I don’t need either of your approval.”

“Would you like some more vodka?” Russia asked Lithuania who nodded. “You too England?” 

“Sure.” 

Belarus gulped down her glass as Russia poured more vodka into their glasses.

“Belarus?” Russia asked her and she nodded as she’d just finished her glass. Russia leaned over to pour more vodka into hers.

Russia sat down and folded his hands in front of him. He cleared his throat. “Now that we’ve eaten I have something I’d like to tell you all, especially you Belarus.” Russia looked at each of their faces and when his eyes landed on hers, she smiled. Russia let out a sigh. “I’ve wanted to say something for a long time but I didn’t really have the right opportunity to.”

Belarus could feel her heartbeat in her chest. _Was he going to propose?_ She had been dreaming of this moment for centuries. She’d hoped it’d be in a more private setting with just the two of them but at this point it was just astonishing he was going to do it at all. So she wasn’t complaining.

“I’m gay.”

Belarus furrowed her eyebrows. _What?_

“What? Isn’t that illegal here?!” England exclaimed.

“No, it is not. But I’d like to keep it between the four of us. I don’t think my boss would be too happy about it.”

“Oh yeah, that makes sense. Well I’m happy for you Russia.”

“Thank you, but your opinion doesn’t matter that much to me. Lithuania, I did all of this because I have feelings for you. I wanted you to know.”

Lithuania blinked furrowing his eyebrows.

“W-What? You are the joking with me r-right, Mr. Russia?” Lithuania wrung his hands together, visibly sweating while wearily looking over at her. Belarus meanwhile could only hear a ringing in her ears.

_This is not possible._

_This is not happening._

Out of all the nightmarish things that her imagination dreamed up, this was not one of them.

“No Lithuania. I am telling the truth.”

“W-why didn’t you tell me in private?”

“I wanted Belarus to know too. Maybe then she would stop trying to marry me.”

“Well then why am I–.” England started.

Belarus gripped the knife on the table used to cut her roast. In one swift motion she jumped over the table, tackling Lithuania to the ground. Belarus’s chair came with her, hitting England in the head, knocking him backwards and onto the floor. The chair Lithuania was sitting on, fell backwards as they slammed into it on the floor, the wooden back split down the middle. Russia stood up as the leftover food was knocked to the floor, Belarus’s chair having snagged the table cloth. Loud _bangs_ and _clangs_ followed in her wake.

“You backstabbing SON OF A BITCH!” Belarus yelled in pure unadulterated rage. She stabbed Lithuania in his chest before pulling the knife out quickly to do it again. She screamed, as tears started to cloud her vision. She stabbed him again and again, blood splattered onto her clothes and face as Lithuania screamed. His eyes were wide and fear ridden. Her hands became red with blood, sticky, wet and warm.

Then she felt arms wrap around her waist before she was hastily pulled off of Lithuania.

Belarus wailed and thrashed wildly, Through her blurry vision she saw Russia staring back at her, frightened as if she were a monster. His mouth was tucked into his scarf as though he could hide within it.

“Belarus! Stop!” England said tightening his arms around her. 

“No! I want to kill him! How dare he!” She struggled in his grasp, she was strong but the chair was also weighing her down.

“You’re scaring Russia! Please!” He pleaded with her and she stopped thrashing around. Tears rolled down her cheeks. She let out a choked sob before she dropped the knife, now covered in Lithuania’s blood. It dropped to the floor with a _clang._

England put her down and let her go. Then he unlocked her cuffs. 

“B-big Brother, I’ll help clean up.” She said, furiously wiping away her tears. Russia stood still trembling, not saying a word.

“Russia could you take Lithuania upstairs and clean him up?” England asked him. Russia nodded hurriedly. He lifted Lithuania up who had passed out from blood loss, and stepped around Belarus to carry him upstairs. Belarus had stabbed him about 10 times.

England shook his head. “Tsk all this good food, gone to waste.” He said. “Do you know where Russia keeps his cleaning supplies?” Belarus shook her head. “I’ll go ask.” England said going towards the steps. 

Belarus went into the downstairs bathroom to wash the blood off of her hands and face. She went back into the dinning area, righted each of their chairs and pushed them into the table. She was squatting down, picking up the fallen utensils when England returned. He disappeared into the kitchen before returning with a mop, bucket, broom and dust pan. 

“Belarus if it’s any consultation, I’m sorry about what I said. Russia does love you, just not in the way you hoped.” He said, beginning to mop up the spilled vodka and tomato sauce. 

Belarus frowned going into the kitchen to deposit the fallen silverware into the sink. Belarus hmphed when she returned, “About time you came to your senses.” 

“I’ll take that as I’m forgiven.” He said.

Belarus grabbed the broom and dustpan to sweep up the broken glass from the floor. While they worked in silence, Belarus kept stealing glances at the Englishman. There was something unconventionally attractive about him. Although at first glance his face was plain, his large, bushy eyebrows worked for him and his eyes were a striking emerald green. He was also sporting a purplish bruise from where the chair hit him on his forehead.

“Do I have something on my face?” He asked turning towards her, having caught her looking at him.

“A bruise.” She said, turning away to go dump the pan in the trash.

 _Shouldn’t you be more upset about Russia? Shame on you, looking at that tea drinking bastard._ She scolded herself, while shaking her head to clear her thoughts. 

Belarus went back out to grab the plates and pans to wash in the sink. When she came back into the kitchen, England was returning the mop, bucket, broom, and dustpan to their rightful places in the pantry.

“Can I help with the dishes?” England asked, approaching her at the sink. 

“Do whatever you fucking want.”

England would dry and put away while she washed. They started off in silence in the beginning, only the sounds of running water and scrubbing could be heard.

“Did you get rid of the dress?” He asked.

“I did.”

“Would’ve come in handy now, yeah?”

“I have my black one. I can get the blood stains out of this one. It’s not like I haven’t done it before.” She said handing him a newly cleaned plate. He wiped it to dry. England shook his head and pursed his lips.

“I won’t be making you any more dresses then.”

“You should. I looked good in it.People said so.” She said blunt and unenthusiastic.

“Do you know how much money that fabric cost me?” Belarus looked at him then before shrugging. “It was quite a bit of money! How rude of you to get rid of a gift I spent time and money to make!”

Belarus rolled her eyes and passed him a few spoons to dry.

“But... you got a lot of compliments and that means praise for my needlework. So, I’ll consider it.” 

“Did you think I looked good in the dress?”

“Why would you ask me that? I-I think I did a good job.” England said not meeting her eyes, his cheeks dusted pink. “And you looked how you always did.”

“What does that mean?”

“Take it how you will.”

Belarus frowned. What did the Englishman think of her? She was curious, he was the only one who hadn’t commented on how nice she looked when she talked to him. 

_I should straighten out this Russia business first._

“What should I do now? I’ve done everything for Russia and to be with Russia. If he does not want to be with me because I do not have a penis, should I get surgery to become a man?”

“Belarus, Russia has given you a final no; stop chasing him.”

“B-but I could–.” She started but England gripped her shoulders to turn her to face him. His expression was stern as she looked into his green eyes. 

“I can’t be any more direct. Do not continue to pursue Russia.” 

Belarus sighed. She had given her last hurrah. The Universe had spoken. She was not meant to be with Russia.

They finished the dishes shortly after, silence filling the air. Belarus went over to and opened the freezer to pull out a package of peas. “Sorry about hitting you with the chair at dinner.” Belarus said, walking over to the Englishman and leaning up to press the peas on the bruise.

England raised his hand up to replace hers in order to hold up the peas. Belarus briefly felt his fingers brush against hers as she pulled away, sending a jolt through her.

“It’s fine. It’ll be gone by tomorrow anyway. I’m surprised you’re taking this Russia thing well and not devastated over what is essentially heartbreak.” He said eyebrows furrowed.

Belarus also wondered why she didn’t feel as sad as she should be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Crticism Welcome.
> 
> Translation Courtesy of Google Translate
> 
> Blagodaryu vas--Thank you


	5. Roses in the Garden

Lithuania was still unconscious the next day. Russia sent Belarus and England home early, with some leftovers from China’s house. Russia had packed them in two small travel containers and practically pushed them out of his house.

Belarus frowned and so did England. “That was rude. I know you stabbed Lithuania but we cleaned everything. It’s not like you could’ve killed him.” He said, grabbing his luggage.

“He just wants Lithuania all to himself.” Belarus said.  _ Was it fair to be bitter over this?  _ She wondered, also grabbing her luggage.

“Hmm. I really thought this would be an outing for you two to bond. But I guess you can’t rush these things. America and I didn’t become on friendlier terms until WWI, and even now you couldn’t say we have the best relationship.” England said, a bit discouraged, walking beside her.

“They’re going to have anal intercourse all around the house.” Belarus responded.

“Y-you don’t know that!” England said, sounding flustered. Belarus glanced at him, seeing his increasingly reddening face. 

“I don’t but it’s fun to see you embarrassed.” Belarus snickered. 

“Whatever.” England said putting his bag down as they reached the end of Russia’s walkway.

“But dziakuj, tea drinker. Russia and I may not have improved our relationship much but we are friends, yes?” Belarus could admit, she liked having the Englishman around. 

“I guess I can’t get rid of you now that you’ve had your heartbroken. So I suppose we are friends.” 

England met her gaze and the sun lit his features in such a way that had her in a short state of awe.Belarus felt her heart beat in her chest, before she looked away from him. She nodded, looking out at the road in front of them.

They waited for their taxis to come.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Belarus was at home, watering the roses in her garden. It had been a few days since her visit to Russia’s. China’s food: a few bao dumplings, and some noodles, was a good dinner. It was a nice change from the usual potatoes she ate. The roses were growing nicely: the yellow sun sprites, damask roses, and red roses they’d planted. Maybe she’d snipp some of the heads and give them to England when she saw him at the World Meeting next week.

Belarus went back into the house. She didn’t have the same nightmare anymore but she now had dreams of dying sunflowers and daisies. They didn’t keep her up at night but they were bizzar to say the least. 

Belarus was checking her fireplace when she heard a knock at her door. She got up and opened it to see Lithuania.

Belarus went to slam it shut but Lithuania held his foot in the door. “Go away!” She yelled at him.

“Belarus, please! I want to talk.”

“I have nothing to say to you! I don’t want to hear about the fuckfest you and Big Brother had!”

“What? Belarus let me explain!” 

Lithuania forced his way into her home. He held a bouquet of red Ingrid Bergman roses in his hand.

“Are those for me?” She asked, skeptically. 

“Y-Yes! Take them!” He said holding them out to her. Belarus did take them and sniffed them. They reminded her of England, and she decided she would give them to him instead.

“ Dziakuj, they will be a good gift.” She said going into the kitchen to fill a tall pitcher with water.

“Y-you’re not going to keep them?”

Belarus shook her head before sitting down on her couch.

Lithuania sat next to her.

“What do you want, Lithuania?”

Lithuania wrung his hands together before combing a trembling hand through his hair.

“I-I thought about what you said about the nightmares.”

“Oh you figured out why I was having them?”

“Yes, it’s because you were denying your feelings. B-but we both know that the whole thing with Russia isn’t going to work out. So, you don’t have to deny them anymore.”

_ Denying my feelings?  _ Was she being put through all of that psychological torture just so she could confront the possibility that she had feelings for England?

Lithuania turned to her then and gripped her hands in his own. “A-and I want you to know, I feel the same way.” 

Lithuania looked into Belarus’s midnight blue eyes with his own forest greens.

“What?” Belarus furrowed her eyebrows.

“I have uh feelings for you Belarus, like you do for me!” Lithuania smiled nervously.

“No, I don’t.”

“Y-you told me you were having nightmares. And you know, I thought you were using hypotheticals. Like you were asking me for help about the nightmares because they were about me. Were you not doing that?” Lithuania’s smile looked even more forced, his expression panicked. His eyes were wide as well.

“No, they weren’t about you.”

Belarus felt Lithuania’s grip on her hands tighten, 

“T-then who?” He asked, voice strained, posture now tense and rigid.

Belarus wondered if Lithuania would break her fingers with how tight he was gripping her hands.

“None of your business! Fuck off!” Lithuania’s expression was serious, and to be completely honest Belarus was a bit scared. Lithuania was usually a pushover but now he looked ready to kill. “And how dare you! Big brother is in love with you, and you have the nerve to be in love with me! Does he not deserve happiness?” 

“Y-Yes of course Mr. Russia deserves happiness! B-but not from me.” Lithuania let her hands go, looking down in his lap.

“I can’t help it Lady Belarus! I thought you’d notice that my love for you burns brighter than the hottest stars. Come on, give me a chance! A full date this time, please?” He said gripping her shoulders, eyes holding eagerness.

Belarus pursed her lips. She did not like Lithuania and she didn’t like him even more because he had Russia’s affections. But she held a bit of resentment for Russia because of his choice of Lithuania, and in a way she could get back at him by dating Lithuania. A mischievous smile spread on her face.

“Sure.”

“Oh I’m so happy you said yes! I have a date planned for us tomorrow night! We’ll go to a book reading!” Belarus hoped the book wouldn’t be boring. Belarus nodded. “Great! I’ll pick you up at five.” Lithuania said getting up. He smiled at her, letting out a giggle. “See you then!” He said, turning to leave. 

~~~~~~~

Belarus went out and bought a military style jumper skirt. It was a black skirt with buttons down the front and suspenders. She wore a white long sleeve shirt with ruffles on it, with it. Belarus’s black bow was on her head. She stepped into Lithuania’s car, he was wearing a coal gray suit with a pink undershirt and a black tie.

“Are you ready to go?” He asked.

Belarus nodded. They drove two and a half hours back to Vilnius. When they pulled into a parking space, Lithuania went to open the car door for her.

They found a spot near the front, a small round table for just the two of them. A new author was doing a reading of his new romance novel. The main character was in some kind of post apocalyptic enclave. He was hearing voices in his head so he went to a doctor. And that was when Belarus tuned out, she was bored of the story. Belarus managed to sneak a selfie of her and Lithuania while Lithuania was engrossed in the story.

She had proof that they were together.

Belarus took some pictures of the author reading his novel, and Lithuania while he wasn’t looking. When he was finished everyone snapped before going over to his table to get a signed book. 

“Did you like it?” Lithuania asked her.

“It was kind of boring.”

“Oh well, we won’t do this again if it’s boring for you.” Lithuania looked down at his clasped hands. “Would you like to get something to eat? I’ll treat you. I know a cafe close by.” He perked up.

Belarus was a bit hungry now, and it was quite late so she could use some coffee.

“Ok.”

Soon she and Lithuania were seated at a small table, across from each other. There were a few people in the cafe, most were college students, studying for their exams. Most had large coffees. Belarus got a cup of hot mocha and a blueberry muffin. Lithuania got a Brazilian blend. 

“So Belarus, I uh have your knife.” Lithuania said, taking out a flat box wrapped in a bow. “I also added a little something extra in there for you.” He smiled.

“Oh! Yes, that is one of my favorite knives.” Belarus took the box from him.

“So what do you like to do Belarus? What are your hopes and dreams?”

Belarus shrugged, “I like stabbing people and making them uncomfortable. I also like potatoes because they make such a hearty meal when you are tight on money.” She sipped her coffee, “My hopes and dreams were to become married to Big Brother but that is not possible now so I don’t know.”

“W-well that’s interesting. I-I want to get married someday too. But, I-I’m sure you’ll figure out a new dream. I-I prefer reading literature as you can see from my choice of date.” He let out a small laugh.“Oh, and I even do a little Jiu Jitsu on the weekends when we don’t have meetings.”

Belarus raised her eyebrows, “You?” 

Lithuania nodded. “Is that hard to believe?”

“Yes! You are a pushover!” Belarus taunted him, “Weak willed and fragile! You can’t possibly stand up for yourself!”

“I’m passive. Jiu Jitsu is about self defense! I’ll only use it when absolutely necessary. I’ve only been taking classes for about 2 years.”

Belarus chortled at the frown on Lithuania’s face. He was getting upset. 

“I will tell you a funny story. I got paired with France in our hotel during the trip to Spain last year.” She took a piece of her muffin and popped it into her mouth.

“I thought you shared a room with Ukraine.” Lithuania said.

“This was before then. I forced Italy to switch with me because I didn’t trust the little pasta eating fucker with Ukraine.” Belarus said sipping her coffee again. “So anyway, he was asking me to have sex with him. And I kept telling him no. But then this last time I said yes.”

“You said yes?!” Lithuania exclaimed in a bit of a panic.

“Let me finish!” She hissed, slamming her palm on the table. “I told him to close his eyes and take off his clothes, while I was in the bathroom.” A cruel smile started to creep onto her face. “I turned on the tub and wet all of our towels. And then I filled up a bucket with cold water.”

Belarus lifted her hand to about chest level to make a motion to show how much water was in the bucket.“And then France said from outside the door, ‘Are you undressed yet? Because I am!’ 

‘I am. Keep your eyes closed.’ I said.”

‘I heard water running, are we going to shower together?’ He asked.”

‘Yes. We’ll be getting wet.’ And then France laughed like he usually did.”

Belarus waved her hand around.

“So I opened the bathroom door and dumped ice cold water on him. He furrowed his eyebrows upon seeing me fully clothed.”

‘Oh! So you were playing a trick on me! Hand me a towel.’

‘They’re all wet.’ I said and I couldn’t stop the giggles from escaping me.” Belarus grinned wickedly.

‘You are an evil woman.’ He said to me and he was so angry, his face was red. And I laughed all the way down to the check out desk, to get us new towels. He had to stand there shivering until I got back.”

Belarus smirked looking at the other nation who sat blinking at her. 

“He didn’t ask me to have sex with him again the rest of the trip after that.”

Lithuania did not look amused.

“Oh.” He looked to be in thought. “You saw France naked?” He asked her, eyebrows furrowed.

“Yes, and I will admit he is impressive. But hasn’t everyone? It is not a big deal, Lithuania.” Belarus said with a raise of her eyebrow.

Lithuania looked annoyed and the mood of their late night outing had turned sour. He rose from his seat suddenly. “Let’s be going.” He said, firmly.

The ride was quiet, and Belarus felt a bit upset because she had been genuinely trying to make Lithuania laugh. Lithuania took her home and it was almost midnight. “See you at the next meeting.” She said outside of the driver side window.

“Yes, see you then.” With that he drove away.

~~~~~~~~

The next day Belarus received a phone call on her house phone. She picked up the phone.

“Hello?”

“Belarus. I wanted to ask you, would you be up for a scrimmage football game after the next World Meeting?”

“England? How did you get my number?”

“I asked America. Now about the scrimmage game?”

“Oh yes. That sounds fun. I am usually bored after the meetings. I can’t wait to see you cry when I beat you.”

“What? Who said you were going to beat me? No I’ll be serving your arse!”

“We’ll see. And you’ve just made a mistake calling me. I’ll be disturbing you while you sleep.” Belarus let out a chuckle in cruel delight.

“Oh bloody fucking hell.” He sighed, before hanging up the phone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Criticism welcome.
> 
> Translations courtesy of Google Translate
> 
> Dziakuj --Thank you


	6. The Green-Eyed Monster

Belarus had just finished watering the roses in her garden when Lithuania called her. “Lady Belarus! I’m sorry for how upset I was when we were on our date a couple of nights ago.” He said to her once she picked up the phone.

“Hmm, you were kind of an asshole.” She remarked.

“I shouldn’t have gotten upset. I’m glad you got France to stop bothering you; I know how persistent he can be. How can I make it up to you?”

Belarus took a moment to think about it, if she spent more time with Lithuania she’d have more pictures to show Russia. 

“There is at Cat Museum, here in Minsk. Would you like to go?”

Russia was a big cat lover. Although Belarus didn’t care much for them.

“Yes that sounds fun!”

“Good, I’ll get our tickets. You pay me for them.”

~~~~~~~~~~

The next day the two nations went to the cat Museum, Lithuania drove them.  They admired the cat themed paintings: cats in cities, cats in gardens, cats on posts, cats playing cards, cats everywhere.

Belarus did not care much for any of it, but Lithuania seemed to be enjoying himself and she snuck a few pictures of him as he admired the paintings. The real interesting part was when they got to the area where they could pick up and pet the cat staff.  Most of the cats were minding their own business and didn’t come in their direction.

Lithuania picked up a brown cat, with a white fur on its face and chest. It had green eyes and a ribbon around its neck. “Oh he’s so cute!” Lithuania scratched behind the cat’s  ears, Belarus took a picture of him doing so.

“Do you want to hold him?” Lithuania asked, holding the cat out to her. She stared into its eyes, before it made a hissing noise and Lithuania pulled it away. “M-maybe not?” He said with a light chuckle before placing it down and it scampered away.

“I could take a picture of you with one. I’ve been seeing you taking the pictures of me.” Lithuanina said with a smile.  _ If Russia saw us both with cats it would make him even more jealous. _

“Yes, find me a cat.” Belarus said. Lithuania nodded and crouched over to pick up a white cat with a fluffy brown tail and brown fur covering his left eye and ear.

“This one?” Belarus noticed that the cat had dark strips of fur just above its eyelids that resembled eyebrows. When she looked at the cat’s green eyes it hissed at her, loud and startled. It started squirming around before Lithuania dropped it. “Oh no.” He said as it scampered away. Lithuania looked at her apologetically. “I’ll find another one.”

Lithuania walked over to a cat that was pure white with grayish fur between its yellowish eyes. It was wearing a pink bow around its head. It was staring at a large cat with bushy brown fur. When Lithuania picked it up, it hissed at him and tried to scratch his face. “Ahhh!” Lithuania tried to keep it far away from his face. His eyes were wide in fright. 

Belarus grabbed the cat and pulled it close to her chest. “This one,” she said as the cat hissed more and she pet it between its eyes, before it calmed down.

Belarus handed Lithuania her phone and he took the picture. Belarus squatted and set the cat down, and it walked away. She turned, upon feeling a sensation of something brushing against her legs, and there was the cat with the weird eyebrows. It looked at her curiously. “What do you want?” She asked. She frowned as it made a little chirp like noise before she pet the cat between its ears.

“It looks like that one also is fond of you Belarus.” Lithuania said before snapping another picture. 

It then started purring.

Belarus decided that she also liked this cat. It gave her a sense of familiarity.

\----------------------------

Belarus found that by the World Meeting those roses Lithuania had given her were dying. So she decided to take one and press it into the crime novel she’d finished. She knew England liked reading, having seen him do so the week she stayed with him. So she’d give him that instead. Belarus discarded the other dying roses in the trash.

Belarus packed her athletic shorts, t-shirt and gym shoes in her luggage bag. Belarus went out and bought a ladder trim dobby wrap dress. She packed that one along with her usual blue and black dresses. 

The World Meeting was in Hungary and Belarus was giddy inside. She’d be showing Russia the photos of her and Lithuania on their date. She wondered how he’d react. _Will he be jealous?_

And she’d be giving England his present. _Will he like it?_

Belarus walked into the meeting room, wearing her black dress this time. She also wore the necklace Lithuania gave her, the “something extra” he added with her knife. She looked around to see England talking with China. Belarus crept up behind China and put her hands on his shoulders. The older nation visibly tensed. “Don’t touch me!” China flailed his arms, turned, and stepped back from her. “What do you want, aru?”

“Your food is good.”

China smiled. “Xièxiè. I try my best! I’m glad Russia gave you some, it’s about time you had some good food.”

“Look what you’ve done.” England said glancing at her with pursed lips and his arms folded. “Step off your high horse China.”

“You’re just jealous, aru. No one would ever say that about anything you made.” China waved him off with a flick of his long sleeve.

“Take that back! It’s just a rumor! My cooking is the absolute best!” England said pointing an accusing finger at China and furrowing his eyebrows.

“Did I ever tell you a funny story?” Belarus cut in.

“No, but I like funny stories.”

Belarus glances at England with a mischievous smile. “England tried to cook stew.”

“God! I thought we were past that now!” England exclaimed before stalking past them to go over to Japan. 

Belarus snickered and relayed the story once again to China. China laughed as well after she finished the story.

“I should have expected that. Once a terrible cook, always a terrible cook.” China shook his head. “If you want more food, I’ll be willing to make you some. Just let me know, aru.” China tipped up his nose. Belarus nodded eagerly and the two exchanged landlines.

Belarus went over to where England was talking to Japan. She crept up to England and reached up on her tiptoes to cover his eyes. “France if you don’t–.” He started, a growl in his tone.

“I’m not France! But close your eyes anyway and hold out your hands.”

“Alright, but I’m slightly skeptical.”

Belarus snickered, noticing Japan was watching curiously. Belarus uncovered England’s eyes and walked around to where he held out his hands.  Belarus took out the book and brought it down onto England’s open palms with an audible  _ smack.  _ England yelped in surprise, opening his eyes to see the book in his hands. 

“A gift, for you.” She said, looking at him, her blue eyes wide and hopeful.

England’s face became a reddish hue. England coughed, not meeting her eyes. “Thank you.”

“Do you like it?”

England tugged at his shirt collar, “I-I don’t know yet. I’ll let y-you know when I read it.” He looked uncomfortable, as his neck became red too. “E-excuse me for a moment.” England turned to leave the meeting room.

Belarus turned to see Japan giving her a small smile. 

_ What the fuck is he smiling about? _

Soon the meeting started and she sat in her usual seat beside Russia. Hungary was giving a passionate speech about etiquette. She was tired of the predatory nature of most of her male nation peers. 

“If we repressed our sexual nature then we would all be Angleterre and that would be the worst tragedy of all!” France said in protest.

“Shut the bloody hell up you frog-faced tool!”

“England is not the only one France. We could look at Japan or Germany for examples.” Hungary said, trying to regain control of the discussion.

“Ah yes the erotic manga artist and the BDSM lover. Perfect examples.” Prussia spoke up then. “And aren’t you a, how does Japan say it? A Fujoshi? Little miss shipper!”

Belarus tuned them out after that. 

Belarus nudged Russia. Russia turned to her, eyes wide. Belarus slid her phone over to him, open to the pictures of her and Lithuania. Russia furrowed his eyebrows and took the phone.

He scrolled through them before giving her a glare.

“What are you doing Belarus?”

“Who me? I’m not doing anything.” Belarus fluttered her eyelashes innocently.

Russia gave her an unamused look. “Belarus, I know you do not like Lithuania. Why are you going on outings with him?”

Belarus shrugged, “I can do whatever I want. Lithuania asked me so I said yes and who could say no to cats?” Belarus gave him a Cheshire Cat grin, “You are not jealous are you, Big Brother?”

Russia pouted. “No. But I do not think you should string him along.”

“I’m just having a little fun, and then he’s all yours.” Belarus said to him with a wave of dismissal.

“Alright, thank you Hungary. It is time for our snack break. We will reconvene for questions afterward,” Germany said.

Belarus got up and went towards the snack room when she bumped into Lithuania.

“Lady Belarus! I-I brought you the gift.” Lithuania said holding out a small plush brown teddy bear.

She smirked thinking about how she could irritate Russia a bit more. She took the bear from him. “Dziakuj Lithuania.” Then she reached up and kissed his cheek.

“L-Lady Belarus!” Lithuania exclaimed before letting out a giggle. He covered his mouth with his hand to stop but his eyes still showed mirth. 

Belarus felt eyes on her and looked over at Russia but he hadn’t been paying attention; he was talking with China. 

“Well I’m glad you like it. Maybe we could go out for ice cream later!”

“Well I–.”

“She has a prior engagement. We’re still having that football match, aren’t we?” England asked, having come up to them.

“Oh yes. Sorry Lithuania, I’m going to kick England’s ass in football after the meeting.”

“Football? Would I be able to join?” 

“It was just going to be the two of us but if you can find a fourth person then I guess that’s fine.” England said with a huff.

“Ok, I will ask Poland. I get to be on Lady Belarus’s team.” Lithuania said, smiling that overly polite smile of his. England narrowed his eyes, “I see how it ‘tis. You don’t want to be on my team because you think we’ll lose.”

“Are you all talking about a fútbol game?” Spain asked on his way past them to leave the snack room.

“Belarus, Lithuania, and I are going to play a scrimmage game after the meeting.” England said, annoyance in his tone.

“Ooh! I want to play!”

“If you must.”

“Whose team am I on?” 

“I suppose you’re on mine.”

Spain furrowed his eyebrows, “Can I be on someone else’s team?”

England frowned, “Do you want to play or not?” 

“I’ll pass.” Spain said with a smile as he walked away.

A man who looked identical to Spain came up to them, and slung his arm around England’s neck. “I’ll be on your team, amigo.”

England looked to the other nation slightly surprised before smiling at him. “Oh Portugal, that’s great.” He looked back at them then, “Well it’s settled then.”

Belarus noticed that England was ok with Spain’s twin touching him. And then she felt a weird tightness in her chest.

~~~~~~~~~~~

They’d asked Hungary for a good place to play football and she pointed them in the direction of a park not too far from the hotel about half of the nation’s who came to the meetings stayed in. When they’d gotten there, Belarus noticed America and Russia were in the middle of a basketball game at the court near the football field. The two kept up their rivalry through occasional sports matches. 

Belarus made eye contact with Russia and latched onto Lithuania’s arm in response. Lithuania was surprisingly fit, from what she could feel of his bicep. Lithuania was of a stocky build while also being tall. It surprised her that Lithuania never really acted aggressively although he was strong. Lithuania smiled at her. Belarus did not smile back. 

They were all wearing shorts, sneakers, t-shirts and knee high socks for the match. Belarus had on her white bow. Belarus and Lithuania were a short distance behind England and Portugal. England was holding the ball. She’d never noticed how pale and lean his legs were before. 

“Alright, we’ll play a fair game, yeah?”

Belarus was facing England with Lithuania not too far behind. Portugal stood behind England, stance determined and ready for the defensive.

“Yo, Britain! Are you dudes about to play soccer?” Belarus frowned as America made his way over with Russia not far behind.

“What does it bloody look like, idiot?”

England snapped at him.

“Well we’re gonna crash your game, kay? I’m on Liet’s team and you take the loser Limey’s team, Russia.”

America said walking over towards their side.

“I am only on this team because Belarus frightens me, not because you told me. You do not give me orders, da.” Russia said becoming the other team’s goalie.

“Whatever, let’s play!” America said, pushing Lithuania out of the way. “I’m totally not being goalie, dude.”

“A-ah that is fine Mr. America. I can be goalie.” Lithuania went farther back to guard their makebelieve goal post.

And with that the game began. England tossed the ball up and Belarus was the first to get to it. Belarus ran towards Portugal who managed to take the ball from her. Belarus blinked before turning around to see Portugal pass the ball to England. Belarus ran towards where they were, and America tried to kick the ball away from England but he missed.

Lithuania was the last defence as England reeved up to kick the ball. Lithuania scrambled to catch the ball. Lithuania threw it at America who bumped it with his chest. Belarus ran back towards Russia and signaled to America that she was open.

America having been cornered by both Portugal and England at this point passed it to her. Belarus ran in towards Russia.

Russia stood ready, eyes focused on her as she passed the ball between her feet. She swung her right foot back and kicked the ball with such a force, Russia just missed catching it.

She wiped sweat off her brow. She’d scored their first point.

\--------------

“You going to cry, Tea Drinker?” Belarus said after the match. 

“No! You won the stupid match but it’s nothing to cry over.” England said, holding the ball in one hand and the other hand was on his hip. Portugal made a motion that he was going to leave and England said goodbye to him. 

“Thanks for the game, I had a good time. See you around, Inglaterra.” Portugal smiled before going on his merry way.

_ Good riddance. _

Belarus slapped Lithuania’s ass then. The other nation yelped in surprise, and turned to her with red cheeks “L-lady Belarus!”

“Good job Lithuania.” She said, expression neutral. She noticed his ass was almost as firm as Germany’s. Belarus decided to keep this note for a later time.

“O-oh thank you! You did a good job too!” He said with a nod, wringing his hands together. England watched the two of them but Belarus couldn’t read his expression.

“Dude we totally kicked all y’all’s butts! As to be expected because I was on this team!” America yelled breaking out into a dance. “Suck it Russia! I won! Loser!” 

Belarus could see Russia’s purple aura although the nation was smiling.

“You have such tact, America. England raised you well.” Russia’s smile was overly sweet as he gripped America’s shoulder.

“I didn’t make him this way! Take that back!”

Russia shrugged.

“It’s not that late. Would you still like to get some ice cream?” Lithuania asked, cheeks still flushed. They’d walked away from the other nations. Belarus really didn’t want to spend any more time with Lithuania. She back over at Russia who was watching her curiously.

“Sure.”

“This is great! I am so happy we are spending time together, Lady Belarus!” Lithuania said looping his arm in hers. Lithuania led them in the direction of a strip mall further from the park.

“Yes I am thrilled.” Belarus said unenthused.  _ Why am I doing this? Russia isn’t bothered like I hoped he’d be. So this is essentially pointless. _

“You both stopping for ice cream? I’d like to join.” England said, a bit out of breath having run to catch up to them.

“W-well I wanted it to be just the two of us but–.” Lithuania started.

“You may come, Tea Drinker.” Belarus interrupted.

Lithuania looked at her, eyebrows raised. “L-Lady Belarus, are you sure?” 

Belarus nodded, “Yes, I want to gloat more.” She gave England a sardonic glance, gleaming with mischief. 

And so the three of them sat at a table in the ice cream parlor. Belarus had a chocolate moose tracks cone, Lithuania had strawberry and England had mint chocolate-chip.

After Belarus got one last teasing gloat in, the three nations fell into an uncomfortable silence. Lithuania and Belarus were next to each other and England sat across from them. 

“So England, how are things?” Lithuania asked, polite as usual.

“As depressing and irritating as they always are. But I’m not here for idle chit-chat Lithuania.” He licked his ice cream. When his green eyes shifted to her, Belarus felt her heart leap in her chest.

“You two are dating?” He asked, eyes flickering back to Lithuania.

Lithuania found her hand under the table, and interlaced their fingers. Belarus looked at Lithuania with a pointed expression but he was facing England.

“Yes. Isn’t it wonderful?” He said.

England looked at her again, not taken by her lack of response.

“Yes. We are technically dating.” Belarus waved her hand around, lips pursed.

“We got together a little while after the trip to Russia’s. I knew that her infatuation with Russia was only temporary. We’ve known each other for a long time so it made sense.” He said.

“Oh so that stabbing bit was in a fit of love, not jealous rage?” England asked, eyebrows raised in a sarcastic nature.

Lithuania smiled, “It was her way of getting out all of those old feelings. Belarus changed her mind upon finding out I had no plan to pursue the romantic relations with Russia.” Lithuania squeezed her hand. 

“Oh come on Lithuania! You can’t be that blind mate! You don’t think this is all part of some revenge scheme?”

“Revenge? Oh no, that’s not true, right Belarus?”

Belarus frowned, “No.” She glanced at England; she did not like his correct accusations of her. England looked at back at her, disapproval in his eyes. “No, of course not, I care a lot about Lithuania.” Belarus smiled sweetly at him, her most faked smile. 

Lithuania smiled his polite smile, “Jealousy doesn’t look good on you England.” Lithuania said after licking his cone.

The Englishman stood up, “Fanfuckingtastic, I’m happy you two have each other.” He said before stalking toward the door.

And I’m not jealous!” He said in the doorway before leaving for good.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hungary’s topic was just so I could poke fun at England using France. I love insulting England through France.
> 
> Thank you for reading! Crtiticism welcome.


	7. Pale Skin, Sunscreen, and Bathing Suits

Belarus ultimately decided to keep the charade going because Lithuania would send her potatoes and she really liked potatoes. Lithuania didn’t want much from her, just her company sometimes. She’d hold his hand, flutter her eye lashes at him, or give him a smile all in the name of keeping up appearances. Sometimes he’d kiss her cheek. They hadn’t even kissed on the lips yet, so it wasn’t like she was doing him any sexual favors either. It was a pretty nice deal if she was being honest.

The only thing that wasn’t great, was the piercing gazes she got from England. They struck her in a way she didn’t like. She wasn’t sure whether she was afraid or...something else.

_“Ah still stringing Lithuania along, are we?”_ Imaginary England asked her, leaning against the doorframe of her bedroom.

“Yeah, so?” Belarus crossed her arms, sitting on her bed.

 _“Oh nothing. It’s just interesting how selfish you are after claiming to be so selfless for Russia.”_ He said, filing his cuticles. 

“I deserve that don’t I?”

_“Well you weren’t really selfless before, it had always been about you.”_

Belarus narrowed her eyes at him. _Is it his sole purpose to antagonize me?_

“Hush! I sacrificed so much for Russia only for it to blow up in my face! I deserve this!” She raised her voice.

 _“You deserve to make Russia and Lithuania unhappy because things didn’t work out the way you wanted? I don’t think that’s fair.”_ He stopped filing and furrowed his eyebrows.

“You know what’s not fair you bastard? Being in love with someone even though they treat you like you’re a monster! I’m a person with fucking feelings!” Belarus stalked over to him, clenching her fists. “Do you think I enjoy seeing Russia terrified at the sight of me? Do you think I enjoyed knowing he’d rather spend his time with anyone but me?” Belarus was in his face, her mouth in a deep frown. “I didn’t!” She paused, looking down. “But I still loved him! I would do anything for Russia! You can’t tell me that’s not selfless!” She barked in his face and poked him in the chest.

_“You caused that yourself. You chose to pursue Russia despite his resistance. If you’d respected his feelings things might’ve been different.”_ He looked at her then.

Belarus searched his eyes, and saw the same judgemental gaze that pierced through her soul. The same one that made her squirm from his real counterpart.

~~~~~~~~~~

The nations were in Italy for the World Meeting. They were forced to go to the beach on the last two days as a sort of vacation. It was supposed to be a time for them to socialize, and build better relationships with each other.

Belarus was sitting on a towel as Lithuania rubbed sunscreen on her back. The nation’s were scattered all around the beach. Belarus looked around. Seychelles was kneeling in the sand, picking up seashells. Italy and Romano were splashing water on Spain. America and Russia were racing each other further out. France was completely naked, not too far from them, laying on a lawn chair to tan. 

Belarus then shifted her gaze to England who was huddled under a huge umbrella. He looked annoyed as was per usual. She then saw Spain’s twin, Portugal, water droplets on his chest, glistening in the sun, having just stepped out of the water. His skin was carmel brown, and looked even more bronzed in the sun. His brown hair was slightly tousled from being wet. He was a bit less muscular than Lithuania , from what she could see of his back muscles and calves. He was walking over to where England was. Belarus grit her teeth. 

Before she could oogle over how much more sculpted and god-like Portugal was, she was standing.

Her feet took her across the burning sand, sights set on reaching the Englishman before Portugal could flaunt his abs and toned biceps to him. She didn’t even register Lithuania calling out to her. 

Belarus reached Portugal and gave him a hard shove, causing him to stumble into the sand. “Move.” She muttered.

Portugal blinked owlishly at her before letting out a chuckle, “Desculpe, senhorita!” 

Soon she was standing in front of England’s umbrella. England looked up at her with wide emerald eyes. She noticed his face was red.

“B-Belarus?” 

“Yes.”

“Shouldn’t you be with Lithuania?”

“Yes but I am here. You want me to leave?” She crossed her arms.

“N-no, actually could you do me a favour?” He then held up his hands to do quotation marks. “I need sunscreen on my back. I asked America but he said, ‘sunscreen’s for losers.’ Fucking git, see if I care that he gets skin cancer. I’m not gonna fucking baby him if he gets sunburned either.” England crossed his arms with a sneer.

“Sure. I can apply sun lotion on your back, Tea Drinker.” Belarus got on her knees in front of him. She then crawled on her hands and knees behind him, and could feel his eyes roam over her swimsuit clad body. She was wearing a two piece blue bikini and her blue bow.

She picked up the bottle of sunscreen beside him and squirted it on his back. He flinched. “That’s fucking cold!” She let out a snicker before placing her hand on his back to start rubbing it in. He had such pale skin, and he was quite willowy. He was of a smaller build than Lithuania, Portugal and Russia.

. 

She lightly touched his shoulder blade with the hand not covered in sunscreen. She enjoyed the feeling of his skin on her finger tips, and feeling him tense at her foreign touch. She’d then moved her fingers down the curvature of his spine. “W-What are you doing?” He asked looking back at her. His green eyes meeting her midnight blues. She pulled her hand away, and stopped rubbing on the sun screen. She’d rubbed it in already anyway, and had just been pretending for a few moments.

“Nothing. I’m done.” She said, feeling her heartbeat frantically.

“Oh, well you better get back then.” He said, his voice even and flat.

He turned away from her, “Lithuania is probably looking for you.” 

And in that moment the umbrella was lifted from over their heads. “Hey!” England exclaimed as they both looked up to see Lithuania and Portugal. Portugal looked apologetic, while Lithuania looked worried. “Belarus? I was calling for you and you didn’t turn back. You’re here with England?”

“She was doing me a favor arsehole. Now give me my umbrella back.” England said standing up. Lithuania took a step back from him. Lithuania looked at her, “Belarus?”

“Ah Lithuania, could I use your umbrella for mein bruder? Prussia is extremely pale, and his skin is burning even with the sun screen.” Germany said having walked up to them. 

Lithuania smiled before handing it to him. “Here you go, Germany.”

England looked ready to pop a blood vessel. “Hey! That umbrella is mine! You can’t just give my stuff away!” England screamed at Lithuania. Germany’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “Just take it, I don’t need it that much anymore.” England said to Germany with a wave of dismissal. Germany nodded and went over to where Prussia was splashing Austria from in the water.

Belarus looked at the water, waves shimmering in the sun. She ran in before feeling the lukewarm water hit her, and waded past the majority of the nations who were crowded at the edge. She dived under once she was farther out. She could see their legs and feet, it was a pretty funny sight before she popped her head above water. She breathed in some air and swam a few laps in what could be considered the deep end.

Belarus started doing a backstroke before bumping her head against something hard. She looked above her to see England. Belarus righted herself and turned to him. She let out a loud guffaw at seeing his bright yellow arm floaters.

“Oh shut up! Do you want me to drown?”

“It might save your dignity.” Belarus said, smiling, sinister and malicious. “How were you a pirate?” Belarus chided him.

England frowned and furrowed his eyebrows. “You don’t need to swim if you have a sturdy vessel!” He proudly proclaimed. “Lots of my men couldn’t swim. It made it easier to intimidate or get rid of them when they weren’t following orders. I had less mutiny that way.” He said with a smirk. Belarus saw a flicker of deviousness in his eyes. 

“Still it would be less humiliating if you learned.” 

England rolled his eyes. “If I wanted to be taunted I’d go over by America.” Belarus smirked before holding her breath. She dived under the water and blinked, she could see England’s torso and his Union Jack swim shorts. She poked him in his stomach. The Englishman flinched and squirmed away from her. Belarus continued poking him until he kicked her in the chest in his panicking of trying to get away from her. Belarus almost opened her mouth, upon feeling a sharp pain where he kicked her.

She swam back above the surface and took in a big gulp of air. England’s face was red, “Why the bloody hell were you poking me?”

Belarus shrugged. “It’s fun to watch you squirm.” She said, eyes dangerous yet mischievous. 

“Well I’m not sorry about kicking you then.” He said, trying to swim away, awkwardly spreading his arms out.

Belarus snickered, while swimming next to him. “I could take you back.”

“No, I don’t need you to.” England said, holding his nose up and away from her.

Belarus grabbed one of his arm floaters, and let the air out. Belarus felt a cruel grin spread across her face.

“Pure evil. You’re pure evil.” England said to her, as he awkwardly flapped his arm. 

And that was how Belarus found herself bringing England to shore. His arms were wrapped around her neck. She could feel his breath, hot against the skin on the back of her neck. Goosebumps prickled down her spine, and Belarus realized she’d never had someone this physically close to her before.“You better get me back safely.” He said.

“You are in good hands, Tea Drinker.” Belarus said, propelling them forward.

When they got back to shore, England got them both towels. She accepted the towel and wiped her face and hair. It was almost sundown. Lithuania came over to them, regarding England with an unreadable expression. “Belarus! I’m sorry I couldn’t be out there with you. Mr. Russia wanted me to swim laps against him.” Belarus looked at Lithuania’s worried expression and glanced at England who was cleaning out his ear with a towel.

“Lithuania, I can’t do this anymore.”

“W-What? I won’t leave your side ever again if you don’t want me too!” Lithuania stepped closer to her.

England stood a ways back, an uncomfortable and uneasy expression on his face. He motioned that he was going to leave before backing up and walking away.

“No. It’s not that. I can’t keep acting like I have feelings for you when I don’t.”

“B-but I thought we made a connection.” Lithuania said, having now gripped her arms. His eyes were panicked, and frantic as they searched hers.

“I lied.” Her expression was neutral, cold and uncaring.

“B-but Belarus, why would you pretend?” Belarus wanted to smack him, it was pretty obvious. _Didn’t he understand?_

“I only went out with you to make Russia jealous. But that didn’t work out so I’m done with you.”

Belarus saw Lithuania’s eyes glisten with tears. Belarus frowned, she usually would be joyed at seeing Lithuania cry but now her stomach hurt.

_Hunger pains?_

“Come on Lithuania, let go.” Belarus wiggled her arms but he tightened his grip on her as it seemed he was being overcome with sobs. He hung his head. 

_Great._

And so she stood as Lithuania cried his heart out for a few minutes. Once he was finished she walked around him and back to her hotel room.

_What a fucking baby._

~~~~~~~~~

The last day of the World Meeting in Italy went by uneventfully. She tuned out the Italy brothers as per usual. She’d greeted Russia and he gave her a quick greeting before he turned his attention to Germany. Lithuania didn’t speak nor look in her direction, he was probably still upset.

It was honestly a relief for her. 

England had stopped his terrifying gazes but she did catch him looking at her a few times during the meeting. 

Belarus didn’t want to swim this time. She’d bought a daphne maxi dress and decided it would be hot enough to wear now. So she relaxed on a lawn chair with a glass of wine, sunglasses perched on her nose.

Then she felt a shade over her, deflecting the sun’s heat just a little. She tipped up her glasses to see England. He was wearing a white button-up short sleeved shirt with khaki shorts. He had his arms crossed and his usual grumpy expression on his face.

“England, you’re blocking my sunlight.”

“I won’t be long.I finished reading the book you gave me. I quite enjoyed it. Do you perhaps need anymore to read? I have a few–.”

“I want a spell book!” Belarus blurted out.

“Hmm, I don’t know, spells are kind of dangerous.” He said hesitantly.

“Please, Tea Drinker!” She pleaded with him.

“Fine.” He said, reluctantly.

Belarus smiled devilishly, “Yes. I’ll be able to curse my enemies.” She said before putting her shades back down.

“Ah yes, of course.” He said unenthused. 

There was a beat of silence before England suddenly said, “I also wanted to applaud you for doing the right thing.”

“Whatever. I only did it because you wouldn’t stop torturing me with your _eyes_.” She said an extra hiss at the end of “eyes”.

“What? I did no such thing! That was your guilt eating up whatever you constitute as a conscience.” 

Belarus frowned, pursing her lips before turning away from him. She sipped from her glass.

“No, I’m sure it was you.”

England grunted, “Believe what you want.” Quick on his promise, he left.

~~~~~~~

Later that night Belarus found herself on the beach again. She couldn’t really get back to sleep.

She looked up at the stars and the half moon on this clear night, her toes in the sand. She thought that her headspace would be clearer now that she was not with Lithuania anymore. But all she could think about was England.

It was strange to have such intrusive thoughts about someone other than Russia. And what exactly was she supposed to do with these thoughts? 

It wasn’t helping just thinking about it, maybe if she saw him again she’d know.

“You couldn’t sleep either?” She heard before she turned to see England seating himself beside her on the sand.

She nodded looking back at the ocean’s waves.

“I-I um. I saw the rose you put in the crime novel. I don’t know how you found out that roses are my national flower.” She heard him say.

_They’re what, roses?_

The rose petals in her dreams, it all made sense. She couldn’t say ‘I love you’ to Russia in her dreams because she loved…

_England_

“I’m really flattered.” He continued. “I don’t know if doing that means something to you, but I have feelings for you Belarus.” He said and she looked at him. The moonlight just barely captured the sparkling of his eyes and the light blush on his cheeks.

Belarus’s eyes flickered to his lips: thin, pink, and slightly parted. She felt a sort of pull as their eyes met again, desire in his stare and presumably in her own. Their faces were now mere centimeters apart. She didn’t know if he had moved or she had. Belarus felt his hand rest on the crook of her hip.

Belarus felt heat on her cheeks, and parted her own lips. Belarus’s heart thumped in her chest as her eyes fluttered closed, she expected to feel England’s lips upon hers but...after a few moments did not.

“Belarus do you want me to kiss you?” He asked.

_Is that what I want?_

Belarus had been at a crossroad and this was ultimately the breaking point. 

Before she wanted desperately to hold onto the few threads that still bound her to her love for Russia. But now it seemed that everything in her primal instincts screamed at her to just let go and submit to the temptation of kissing England.

“Yes, just do it already.” She demanded, her voice gruff. 

At her words of permission, she felt England bridge the miniscule gap between them, connecting their lips in a kiss. 

The End of Part 2.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed the second part of the series as much as I enjoyed writing it! Hopefully you will come back for part 3!
> 
> The story continues even though it kind of seems final.
> 
> Thank you for reading! Criticism welcome.


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